Poop like a champion 

By Asia Jamil

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If pooping and farting are natural body functions, then why be ashamed of it:)

Rather than being embarrassed about pooping, enjoy it because it’s healthy to poop.

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I am going to talk about poop, yeah you got me right. Many things about pooping and just pooping. Genuinely every one of us has bowel movements, but we don’t talk about it. It is embarrassing, socially unacceptable to talk about pooping and everything about it sounds gross. We pretend as if the bigger us don’t do any of it.

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Imagine the discomfort after immediate bowel movement while we are on a date.  The unease is caused by the struggle of controlling the movement, escaping the situation, embarrassment from the smell of poop and the sound of farts from the toilet. We certainly don’t want to disappoint our date. Harder if a team lead or a football coach accidentally farts in front of his team-injury to the dignity. 

About farting, why does it make us laugh or is funny when it is just a sound? When “achoo,”Haaatzhing”, “a~qian!”, Hatsjoe are not funny then why “PFFT” “FRAAAP” “POOT” “BLAT” “BRAAAP” “BRAAAACK” “FRRRT” “BLAAARP” “PBBBBT” are funny? Technically, both are sounds from different functions of the human body. 

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There is a need to know what the preferred way is to poop, how to clean the anus and what to do afterwards. From the past communal to today’s private toilet spaces, humans are keeping the matter confidential. The alarm bell begins to ring when we do not pay attention to our poop appearance and bowel schedule. 

With little variation among individuals in their stool colour, shape and schedule, the bowel movements are normally light to dark brown in colour. A healthy bowel movement is painless and requires minimal strain.

Any obvious changes in stool appearance and quantity, there may be chances of an illness affecting the gastrointestinal (GI) tract or the entire body. Pooping too often or not enough, pain while pooping, blood in stool and watery or dry poop are other alarming signs of health issues. Anyone experiencing any of these types of poops should see a doctor.

Cleaning the inside of the bum after bowel movement varies from country to country. In Asian countries people use water at the end of the business in toilet while in some European countries people use toilet paper or wet wipes.

Bidets are also getting popular in Italy, Portugal, Japan, Argentina, and Venezuela. Modern bidets spray a targeted stream of water around the butt, the genitals and the anus to clean it up gently.

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From ancient times the use of water for cleaning oneself had been common, and the Gayetty’s paper known as toilet paper today ,first introduced in 1857 was available for use as late as the 1920s.

There are major concerns of medical experts regarding wiping with toilet rolls. The wiping alone could potentially leave dirt behind, and its continuous use could possibly lead to health issues as anal fissures and urinary tract infections (UTI).

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Rose George, author of The Big Necessity: The Unmentionable World of Human Waste and Why It Matters, shared with Tonic: “I find it rather baffling that millions of people are walking around with dirty anuses while thinking they are clean. Toilet paper moves s***, but it doesn’t remove it. You wouldn’t shower with a dry towel.

“Why do you think that dry toilet paper cleans you? It has always baffled me. We wash every part of our body except the dirtiest part.”

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Many Asians travelling to the United Kingdom find it challenging to use public toilets when needed. They often carry a water bottle with them to wash themselves after using the toilet.

At Birmingham city centre, 30-year-old Miss Kiran says, “There is a dire need of inclusive toilets in the UK with a water tap inside for those who want to wash themselves after pee or poop. There are inclusive educational set-ups, inclusive job opportunities, yet no inclusive toilet in the UK to cater to the needs of those who wash themselves’’ 

At the bus stand in Birmingham city centre, the group of middle-aged women shared concerns for having no water tap in the toilets in the UK, which is a big challenge for them. Miss Tania leading the group shared, “Poop comes uninvited, and when it comes in a public place, we must control it as much as we can. Because when we don’t wash ourselves, we feel stinky and that makes us very uncomfortable. The toilet paper does not clean the dirt from inside nor do the wipes serve the purpose as much as water can.”

The story of stockpiling of toilet papers during the pandemic had created dearth of it and raised concerns for water taps in toilets across Europe. The Australian news outlet SBS Punjabi light-heartedly mocked Westerns desperate for toilet paper early in the pandemic, urging them to “wash, not wipe” with a gentle jet stream of water.

Let us stay informed about our body functions, poop with pride as it is the key to health, normalize farting, save paper and use water to stay clean:) 

Once done with pooping, washing hands is not a choice, but a need.

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